While it wasn’t the extreme weekend accomplishments of the one before, M and I managed to pack a lot these past few days. Since we’re hosting a Mother’s Day get together, we had to spruce the place up a bit. Ingredient lists needed to be made, schedules worked out. Then we had a night out on the town to King’s with some friends. Wii bowling skills aside, I stunk the place out. I did manage to throw a big nasty hook for a strike, making it easily near the top of my lifetime athletic accomplishments. We restocked the pantry and fridge with wild and exotic food from around the world. But none of this compares to the excitement of the junior criminal accessory kit I picked up Sunday afternoon.
What is a junior criminal accessory kit? 15 feet of ¾” manila rope, duct tape, 32” of remnant 2x4, 50lbs of sand and several sections of ½” iron pipe. Why did I have this? I had my golf clubs, the chores were done, I was free to hit the range. I barely got outside before I saw the raindrops on the windshield. No golf for me. Instead I headed over to the a big box home store.
I’ve written about the monkey bars routine before. It started with some rope and pipe, then moved to steel cable. The cables spawned a medicine ball. Now we have a climbing rope, sand dummy, balance board and an-as-yet-unnamed horizontal bar thing that I will try not to permanently injure myself with. To her credit, M didn’t protest or laugh or put her foot down and say no. The B home gym is just about complete. There was an obligatory ‘should I be worried?’ and a ‘should I sleep with one eye open?’ comment, but once the plan came together I think I resolved those questions. If something terrible were to happen though, it will look bad for ol’ B here. I can see the security camera footage with my cart full being played and the credit card bill up on a projector for the court to see. This here is my defense. The strangest thing was that the cashier didn’t think twice about ringing me up. Maybe if I had a pickaxe or a wood chipper and a tarp it would have looked more suspicious?
