Turkey Day, Cars and Trips

What’s the deal? Why do you post so infrequently?
My acolytes (ok there are none, let’s face it), rather I, have been wondering why I don’t post more often. My defense is that this is a blog of substance. I choose to write about things after they happen and I have had a chance to distill and contemplate, rather than blabber about whatever I happen to have done 10 minutes ago (picked up Joe Flacco as a fantasy keeper next year! sweet!). I’m not trying to make any money with this thing, so I have no incentive to write about the latest and greatest xyz or pontificate about the implications of Henry Waxman (D-CA) getting the chair of the energy and commerce subcommittee from John Dingell (D-MI) . In case you were wondering, it means that Detroit (and the rust belt Midwest) no longer has a big say in energy policy and environmentally friendly California/west does. Bring on the Hemp-powered scooters!! Now everything will smell like a Phish show. But I digress. So what has been interesting to me lately?
Thanksgiving was pretty cool. M and I got our pastured broad-breasted white from the farm and delivered it to my parents’ house in time for a Thanksgiving feast. To my disappointment, there were no 40lb monsters that had been advertised. Turns out that is a good thing, since 40lbs of bird does not fit in most ovens, and that would be quite a disappointment to the gathered masses. So we got the fresh bird, gave it a bath and kept it for a night in nature’s refrigerator – our back porch. I was more worried about dogs, foxes and bears, but the extreme cold was the bigger problem. The next day our fresh turkey was slightly stiff. We were lucky, turns out coolers can keep things warm as well as cold. We dropped off the bird with storage and brining instructions. The brining idea required more explanation, but I think with now 2 successful turkey dunks, it will become more accepted. On the big day M and I got up early so we could make it to a Thanksgiving ‘lunch’ with her family. We gathered the men folk in the TV room for football and the women folk in the kitchen to play with a baby. I played some Wii sports and got a little too competitive. M even got involved and acquitted herself well in the bowling game. After food and desert we headed down to my parents place for Thanksgiving #2. It was good that the meals were 5 hours apart, giving us a chance to digest the first round before jumping in again. It was surprising that even with a relatively standard menu of Thanksgiving day options, that the two sets of food were so different. The staples were the same (turkey, stuffing, gravy, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce), but then were some that made each meal distinct (green bean casserole, broccoli casserole, corn, turnip, acorn squash, brussel sprouts, cauliflower). I think I ate more vegetables than turkey this year. Then on Friday it was off to M’s parents house for another Turkey dinner. Overall I think it was 5 turkeys cooked and 8 plates of food (including leftovers) , probably the greatest eating performance in years. I think Thanksgiving is evolving into my favorite holiday. There’s much less pressure than Christmas, where gifts are involved. Who isn’t happy with a giant pile of delicious food in front of them? Even if you don’t like it, there is pie and cookies to be had afterwards.
M and I have seen a few movies lately. Most recently we watched Body of Lies which was about espionage and terrorists in the Middle East, once again confirming my desires to stay far far away from all things from that area. Russell Crowe plays an excellent bad good guy, although I sometimes can’t tell if he’s acting. I think arrogance is how he rolls. Earlier in November M and I caught the news James Bond movie. The Quantum of Solace turned out to be a very entertaining movie. Not quite a ‘film’, but consistent with the new sociopathic James Bond. The opening chase scene destroyed a quite wonderful Aston Martin. I once read an article that described aspiring owners of Aston Martins to be royalty or close to it. I know Tom Brady owns one and Michael Jordan drives one in a Hanes commercial. They seem to be nice enough cars, but realistically I shouldn’t hold out any hopes for driving one someday. This got me to thinking about why I would spend any time worrying about aspiring to own something so ridiculous. Even in the ‘good’ times, driving around in a car, any car, that costs more than a well appointed house in middle America seems a bit rude. I’m not so sure most owners of cars like that are in touch with reality. It certainly makes it hard to argue your street credentials with one of these as your chariot. Which brings me to my one and only #1 jerk car of all time, the Porsche Cayenne. Normally I ‘like’ Porsches, as in, I do not automatically despise owners of these cars and the cars themselves can be driven daily. There can be an argument made for ownership of a Porsche. SUV’s can be similarly defended. They both have their purposes. But some mad Germans decided to combine the two into a singular offensive automobile. Not only do you get the distinction of driving an incredibly expensive and impractical automobile, but it’s enormous, devours fuel and isn’t particularly good looking. These traits in and of themselves are not enough to make me hate the Cayenne, but it is the sort of people who seek to own a vehicle like this that do. I know several BMW drivers – not at all bad people. I even know a few Mercedes owners – again, nice and wonderful people. But I have had the personal opportunity to become familiar with a proud Cayenne papa and I was not at all surprised to learn what he chose for his personal automobile. The ‘reasons’ for buying the car were probably more absurd than the owner himself. This started me down the road of disliking this car. As I drove, I started to notice more of them on the road, and I stared intently, wondering - is it him?? So far it hasn’t been, but the particular attention I paid caused me to notice how badly these people behave on the road. Racing ahead, tailgating, cutting people off, honking in traffic, parking illegally. Every single one I see has a dweeb behind the wheel. Last night, walking to the train station, a car ran a red light and screeched to a halt in the middle of a crosswalk, not 5 feet from where a group of us were walking. What kind of car was it? A Porsche Cayenne GTS. The driver flailed his hands menacingly at the rush hour traffic. Really? Downtown Boston at 4:55PM? You’re going to part the cars like Moses, just by waving your hands? Maybe you can rev the engine to scare the peons blocking the way. You’re the Jerk Store’s #1 all time best seller there, Mr. Cayenne owner.
Body of Lies marked something of a landmark for M and me. True it was not normally the kind of movie that I could get M to go see, but more than that it was a sort of double date. I’m 31, can I use terms like double date? We watched the movie and went to dinner afterwards with another couple, which turned out to be quite nice. Living where we do has a certain disadvantage of not really being anywhere close to anyone we know. Sure we are friendly with some of the neighbors, but for the most part we leave everyone alone and vice versa. Although we’re proximally close, it’s not a dorm, we don’t have anyone knocking on the door to ask for a blender or band-aids. Our social options have been limited to parties other people throw or convincing people to come out and visit, which is harder than you would imagine. Maybe I smell bad? Recently one of M’s friends moved somewhat closer to our corner of the world and it became much easier to meet up with people because we didn’t have to drive all the way into Boston every time. They have some similar interests and so far we’ve had two outings, the movie and a karaoke-less karaoke night. Maybe down the road we’ll be those friends that the kids make fun of? Parental friends were always kind of strange to me – why did parents need friends when they had these wonderful kids to entertain them? Why did the kids get sent to bed when the friends were over? Why was there always so much laughing ? There wasn’t so much laughing with the kids around… Well now I have friends with kids and hear the stories. Parents need friends, even if it’s to come over for the BBQ or to lose in waffle ball to your 8 year old prodigy. Maybe someday…
But not anytime soon! M and I are going on another trip. This time we’re going to Germany and Austria. I have been told that Christmas to Germans is like Mardi Gras to college students, so I am looking forward to seeing drunken Santa’s helpers and reindeer everywhere. Maybe it’s not quite that way, but it makes the plane rides easier. I did take a year of college German, but most of that was diluted by Jagermeister and Rumple Minze at the time, so any language skills will be shaky at best. So that now will be: Paris, Italy, Greece and Germany (with Spain coming in spring ’09) – I know what you’re thinking. Who is this guy ranting about Porsches when he and the missus are traveling around the world? I hear it from people at work, the ‘what recession?’ jokes, the ‘must be nice with no kids’ remarks. Someone insinuated we have shoeboxes boxes of gold next to our money bin. That’s not the case. M spends exactly 82% of her spare time searching for travel deals. (The other 17% is spent on Anthropologie.com and 1% is spent on scratching my back, in case you were curious) I get a travel proposal sent my way every 4 days and 99% of the time I’m that math-hating moron on ‘Deal or No Deal’, dancing shouting NO DEAL while the crowd erupts and holding out for something cheaper or more exotic, forcing M deeper and darker into the world of airfare searches and hotel availability. Only when I know that either I am going to face physical harm or the deal is too good to pass up do I push that button and hand over the Amex. I have been fortunate (depending on how you look at it) to have traveled quite a bit for work and this goosed up my airline and hotel points (FREE STUFF). The Spain trip will devour the last of those points. Subsequent trips will most likely consist of sleeping in our car or taking the Fung-Wah or Casino buses to the beautiful suburbs of Newark or Parsippany. I bring my lunch to work every day, binge on free coffee from work, keep the house at a snuggly 55 degrees, and I am currently a running joke with my family for refusing the calypso call of HD cable (or cable at all). I even give myself my own haircuts. So easy there, Monks need vacations too.