Saturday, October 29, 2011

Things I shouldn't like but do.

Getting my teeth cleaned. Yeah that's right. With the metal hooks and the aggressive flossing. I try to fall asleep when I go to the dentist, just to show how much it doesn't bother me. Daily flossing? Love it. Even some blood is nice - it's tells me I'm getting deep in there. I sort of like biting my nails, but lots of people like that. I read recently that nail and ice chewing is a mild form of Pica. No bezoars here.

Ever felt the back of a baby's leg? right behind the knee? Maybe it's just baby E, but there's a seriously weird fold there. Like a giant callus. So fun to feel that sucker.

Sore muscles. Like so sore you can't move. Then you take the heel of your hand and push really hard on that sore muscle, until it hurts so much you can't take it, then you push harder. Yeah that's good stuff right there.

Drinking nothing but coffee and not eating. This is probably downright unhealthy, but it sort of gets the whole body buzzing with no lethargy. I don't really do this often, it's more by accident. But when it does happen, it's amusing.

Gossip Girl. what? you don't like the adventures of Blair, Chuck, Serena, Dan and Nate? I left out Vanessa because she's just annoying. I only pretend to not like it so M will let me watch something else. It seems to be an entertaining, yet completely implausible show. At least it keeps my attention. And Chuck Bass is Roger Sterling's long lost grandson. He's terrific.

Nightmares. Every once in a while I get one that is so bizarre and twisted, I think I know where the human centipede guy is coming from. It's nice to know the brain can take a wrong turn now and then. They usually wake me up and stay with me for weeks, making me wonder what the heck is wrong with me. I love knowing that we're not all 100% in control, despite appearances.

Dubstep. This is probably the only one that I seriously questioned putting on the list. Dubstep has to be the tobacco of music. The first 15 times I heard it, I thought it was terrible and stupid. Then I had one more taste and I started to see why someone could like it. I don't crave it all the time, but every once in a while I sneak off and fire up some Skrillex when no one is looking. woobwoobwoobbangbangbangwoobwoobwoob. I feel like I'm in the matrix. I also love me some bad rap like Rick Ross and Wiz Khalifa. No lil wayne. I tried, but weezy got nothing for me.

Mullet cars. Just something about the cars I envied when I was 6. I hadn't even heard about an Aston Martin, but I definitely knew Knight Rider and the Dukes of Hazzard drove. I suppose mullet cars is a pejorative term, but I saw a lot of mullets in those cars and the two will always be associated.

Airplane turbulence. I don't know why everyone freaks out about this. There's 100% nothing you can do about it. If it's your time, it's your time. Deal with it. Being scared isn't going to get you out alive. Plus, going down laughing like a maniac is pretty badass if you ask me.

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